The Kyrgyz Chronicles - Political Correctness or Culture?

Every culture has its nuances that either seem awe-inspiring or just plainly strange. Lately I’ve been wondering where the line lies between culture and political correctness.

For example, if someone can’t speak the local language, then in most circumstances, people go out of our way to speak the common language and make them feel included. (Naturally, this is IF everyone does speak a common language). I’ve seen that in Pakistan, Dubai as well as in the US. But in Kyrgyzstan, that’s not the case. If you’re with a group of people who all speak Russian, they will go ahead and have their conversations in Russian, even if they know you can’t understand a word. Mind you, there’s no deliberate rudeness – if they need to give you some context about something related to you, or if they’re talking about someone you know in common, they will translate it. But if that’s not the case, generally, they’d just go on with their lives. It’s a very need-to-know kind of communication.

Initially, I thought, maybe it’s a cultural thing. But maybe our need to include, or be included is merely political correctness – not really culture.

On the one hand, I think the need-to-know thing makes sense. If someone is not going to have the context, and it would need a whole new explanation to provide the context, then why waste the time and energy? I mean, I’m sure if things were translated word to word, and even if everyone spoke in a common language, the “outsider” or non-local would probably just sit, nod and smile, not really contribute much anyway.

On the other hand, how else would the cultural knowledge transfer?

Maybe it boils down to personalities. I’ve now been on both sides of the table – even within my immediate family we speak either English (among siblings) or Urdu (with parents) and I personally feel awkward not to speak in a common language that is understood across the board (generally Urdu) when we’re all together. But then again, perhaps my family and I have all been in the PC culture for way too long.

I suppose I’ll continue with over-explaining and boring the hell out of people! But for those who don’t want to, I guess you can’t really hold it against them… right?

The Kyrgyz Chronicles - Kyrgyz/Russian Wedding

Long hiatus! But not only am I back, blogs are also back in Kyrgyzstan! So unless you live under a rock... or in the western world, you probably know that there were elections in the Kyrgyz Republic (which is why I assume, blogs were blocked. I could still post a blog, but I couldn't see what I'd posted!)

Atambaev, the front-runner, won. This was an important election because it was after major ethnic riots that pretty much shook all of Kyrgyzstan last year. Uzbeks in the south were being targeted and faced a lot of violence. In cities like Osh in the south, apparently people are still afraid to leave after dark. I can only understand it as how Karachi was after BB's death. And it was horrible horrible. I hope no one has to go through that ever. But there's hope in Kyrgyzstan that Atambaev will bring about some unity, because he's in the same party as the current president, this awesome woman called Roza Otunbaeva who really brought a sense of unity amongst the people after the crisis last year.

Now the history lesson is over, so on to the first ever Kyrgyz/Russian wedding I attended!

Tables are set!

Local caviar... it's orange!

Yep... that's a whole fish... with eyes!

So weddings here are like a 6-hr long concert! There's an MC! And then there are a bunch of acts and a TONNNNNNN of speeches! Basically each table in the hall is brought up on the mic and a representative (or two or three or four!!) has to say a few words about the bride and groom. I had to go up to! Most of the things were in Russian so I didn't get the jokes, but it was jovial for sure! I'm sure the alcohol helped.

More food

The idea is that tables are set up when you enter the hall after the 'nikah" ceremony where the bride and groom sign papers and cut the cake. In the hall, you eat, drink vodka, enjoy the "concert" listen to speeches, go dance, come back, eat some more, drink some cognac, listen to more speeches, go up and dance again, come back, eat, drink some more... you get the picture.

Our "monument of love"

They also have a competition where you have to make a "monument of love" with whatever you have on the table - which is quite a bit! Our table made a pretty... um... lame one I guess. We connected two bananas in the shape of a heart, stuck a balloon to it, placed it in a candle holder with some candies and flowers... Well in retrospect, it's not that lame!

The coolest part of the wedding though, I have to say - was the bride! Apparently she is a ballerina... and heck she could move! Check it out!



RIGHT????

And apparently, no matter where a wedding is, unless there's some Bollywood in it, it's not complete! I have no idea who these gals were, but they had it down - even to the expressions. I honestly NEVER thought I would hear 'Sharara Sharara' at a Russian wedding!



There were some other really cool performances - including this one guy who can apparently play any instrument in the world! He played a flute and trumpet, and he can make the sound of the trumpet with his mouth too. It was pretty awesome. And he has a daughter who is a super violinist, but also has the voice of a goddess! If these people ever make it to those reality shows where they seek talent, they would clean the slate man. I'd have uploaded those videos also... but uploading videos takes up an entire day here! I'll try another time and update the blog.

Overall, it was a fantastic experience. We left after six hours, when they brought another round of meat and potatoes! In the end though, I guess no matter what culture it is, the general spirit of weddings was the same - lots of dancing! Hopefully we'll keep that spirit in 7 months at my wedding! (It's mostly the only part I really care about!)

But oh well - so things are so far so good here in Bishkek! Will keep writing about the new things I learn!

Onwards!

The Kyrgyz Chronicles - Small Victories

Main road to market or word - pretty Islamabad-esque!

I managed to get groceries without help! I feel supremely cool! As promised - pictures!

Local flower shop!

Look what I found on the way!!!

Also, I have amazing stalking abilities too it seems. When I left my apartment I saw a little girl carrying trash - I've been trying to figure out what the hell to do with the trash... so I decided to follow her. Just walked around behind her at a distant, felt very spy-y. Anti-climax though - the trash bins are across the street, actually on the main road. But I was pleased with my prudence, call it whatever else you may!

Crepes - although they're eaten with just powdered sugar.

Local market!

And then the adventure to the local market! The markets look exactly like anything in Pakistan would - like Sunday bazaar - all fresh food! Awesome after eating plastic for so long. I discovered that if I make my hand into a plate and pretend to putting salt, people will understand I'm looking for salt. Once I get the salt, I just have to gesture salt and pepper - and people will get that if I just bought salt, I naturally want pepper! It worked out. Most people have calculators, so they just show me the amount on it, and voila! I have groceries! With most other things, it was point and shoot really.

The one thing we have in every culture - samosa/empanada!

It's not all hits though. I bought what looked like a meat bread for lunch, and when I heated it, it smelled SO BAD that I couldn't eat it. I don't know what kind of meat it was but MAN. Damn. Unfortunately the only other thing I had was a sandwich which turned out to be ham, so I didn't eat it because aside from the fact that I can't, I just don't like the way ham smells either. So I ended up eating fruit and cake. This is a land of cakes man. They have so much cake it's crazy - it means I will have to exercise SERIOUS self control. (Wedding in 6 months man!!!)

Can you almost taste the freshness?!

I could potentially be going to Naryn today, a city in the south. It's a 5 hr drive away. Will keep you posted if it happens!

It’s All About the Context!

I learned the hard way that when you see bottled water in a supermarket in KR, don’t assume it’s still water. The more common form of drinking water here in sparkling – which I hate. So now I’ve learnt (thanks to my buddy volunteer, Faiz) that if I need to buy water, I should check the label to see if it has what I read as “He” in front of what looks like “Ra”. The sparkly one only has the Ra on it. And naturally, both bottles look pretty much similar - just for the sake of irony!

It’s very interesting to buy things purely by context. The other day, I bought what I think looks like cooking oil. It has sunflowers on it, which makes sense, and it was next to something that I could read as “olive”. I assume with the context, it must be oil. I’ll let you know if the next time I make unda, it tastes funny!

But it really does make you think right? When I was young, I wanted to imagine what it’d be like to be blind, so I blindfolded myself and tried to find my way around the house. Lasted 30 seconds, and I ended up a bruised knee. Makes you wonder who the real handicaps are right? 

This is the first time I’m in a place where literally, I have NO CLUE what’s around me or what people are saying. Thanks to Faiz, I’ve so far been able to get food etc. On Saturday I’m hoping to venture out on my own – let’s see what that brings. But I surely can now sympathize – neigh, empathize – with people who don’t understand English in our world of elitist English-ism.

Today, when Faiz and I were walking back into the office after lunch, he complimented one of the staff workers about his haircut. Now this dude is pretty animated and likes to use his hands. I have no idea what he was talking about, but at some point he pointed to my hair, and then gestured something resembling cutting with his fingers, and a few minutes later, the gestures went wild. I heard “keel” and he made a fist and started pretending to stab his neck. I still have no freakin clue what the hell that conversation was about (and why it was my head he pointed to before “keel”ing!) but I burst out laughing at my situation in general!

Almost at the end of week 1!

PS: If you're reading this on FB, you probably can't see the pictures! So visit unplanned30s.blogspot.com. Hopefully some more interesting pictures to come over the weekend!

The Kyrgyz Chronicles - So it Begins...

Finally! I have internet at home! Hallelujah! So the journey can no officially begin.

See the line of lights? That's Bishkek from the plane.

Who would have thought that the thing that I would miss the most would be the SMS sound on my phone (it's a weird bus noise that most of my family absolutely hates). The sound generally meant that the boy was texting (:-( ). A part of me wants to start a countdown to the number of days when I get back to that life (him!) - but then another part of me (the larger part I hope!) realizes that each on of these days that come in the next 6 months, will be such a unique experience that I should not even think about the ending yet. At the end of these months, another beautiful life might be starting, but until then - this is probably the only time I will ever have to be with... me. And although this state of "dissettlement" sometime really gets annoying, I know it's also a period of learning and experience that has really come as a blessing!

Ok enough emotionality and on to the real stuff! Bishkek is... interesting. My first impression, naturally started from the plane. When you look down, the first most noticeable thing is that there really aren't that many lights. Now, I come from Karachi, which USED TO BE "roshniyon ka shehar" (city of lights) and even though we're in dismal conditions back home now, there are still TONS of lights when you land there. In Bishkek, that was an early sign that the city is REALLY DARK. In fact, at work, they gave us flashlights to monitor our path on the walk home because the pavements are uneven and there are 4-ft waterholes on either side - pretty Soviet! So I keep a flashlight in my purse, which has so far come in handy.

US Air Force planes at the Manas "transition" center!

The second most noticeable thing at the airport were the numerous US Army airplanes! It was a bit much quite honestly, to see the first thing at Manas International Airport, be the US Army planes. Kyrgyzstan has a huge US Army base (which they call a transition center, but really it's a base). Bishkek, like most capital cities, is FILLED TO THE BRIM with expats too - but the planes were a bit obnoxious.

Also - EVERYTHING here is in Russian! I will need to pick it up - or I'll be in trouble!

Over the weekend, I'll take pictures of the apartment I'm in and show you why my friend accurately said that it resembles the bachelor pad of a post-Soviet commie dude! Also - promise to post more pics in general!

Onwards!

The Kyrgyz Chronicles!

If ever there’s a reason to restart blogging, it should be because I’ve MOVED TO KYRGYZSTAN! What a wild ride!

The last month has been crazy to say the least. The boy found a job in Boston, MA which is apparently now the new home! I was approached for a six-month voluntary assignment in Bishkek, Kyrgyzstan. Given that the wedding is next year and I would have had to move from DC anyways, I figured, it’s worth a shot. Turns out, it’s a pretty exciting opportunity too! So basically, in the past three weeks, I quit my job, wrapped up life in DC (which was a whole other ball game!), moved the boy and my stuff to Boston, set him up there, went to spend a week in Houston with my family – and voila! Arrive in Bishkek Sunday morning, and here I am!

I’ll get into the details of living n all that in a bit. Right now, there’s no internet at home, but I’m REALLY hoping that that is fixed soon. Once it is – The Kyrgyz Chronicles shall begin! Wish me luck!

New Discoveries...

Today's new meal: Sloppy Joe. Yea I know I know it sounds super unhealthy, but it's not. I just bought the canned sauce, got some lean ground chicken, cooked up the chicken, threw in the sauce, added some salt and jalapenos and you've got the desi version of sloppy joe - served on brown rice. Didn't I just twist it to make it sound healthy!

On another note - the venue is set. Yep. It's done. It's the one place in Sugar Land, TX where every desi and their papa'suncle'schacha'ssaheli'snahalibahen'schachi'sdaughter gets married. But it's done. More desi weddings there = less work for me. I hope. So it's done. Now we just need to finalize the date.

On yet another note - the boy and I couldn't be MORE confused about where the future will take us though. It's probably why we went from December to March to May. I'd thought that's what happens when people who are the same age marry each other - you know same points in your career etc - but it's not. It's just about people in their early 30s in general. All my friends who are 2-5 years around this age group all have the same confusion in their heads. As I said - we planned it till it was time to get out of college and get that first job. After that... boom!